Am very excited to announce “Anti-Emotional Coercian” laws have passed in the UK. Bullying and abuse are more often than not, not about physical damage, but about “financial/emotional slavery”.
For instance hiding a child away in an attic or basement (or anywhere away from the family core and treating them very differently to make them dependent is some of the most severe abuse imaginable).
I was a prisoner of war in my own family home for 12 years in an attic with tiny frosted slit windows overlooking tall hedges in the back. The abuse actually “looks kind”. It is not. The NPD (narcissist personality disorder) parents make the (usually) weak, disabled child dependent so that a short leash and guarantee of bad public behavior and skills results.
NPD parents want perfection or nothing at all. Trust me, an autistic child is not even close to perfect in their eyes. It is “a curse from God”, evil, characteristically bad, etc. Those are bad parents and siblings (who go along with that); not a bad autistic child.
That child develops PTSD which is a healthy response to such abuse. It is if the child did not have it, that there would be a worry. That generally means the child thinks it is okay and passes it on another generation. No thank you.
This PTSD is absolutely no different than returning veterans who have witnessed or been a part of such atrocities. War is hell. So is isolation.
The room was decorated beautifully so as not to give away the ruse. I was also autistic and that abuse began at age five. I cried for 5 straight years to no answer. Then I was “numb” and did whatever I was told the best I could. But isolation is isolation and has been studied to be the cruelest form of punishment on the planet. That is why it is not allowed in any war and is policed by the Geneva Convention. But it still exists at home.
The Geneva Convention does not even allow that kind of cruel and unusual isolation confinement and hasn’t for years. The damage it does is too monumental and inhumane. Sometimes reversal (I got lucky) but sadly more often than not, not.
I (truly) don’t ask for sympathy. I got through it and am quite happy with a loving wife, community and friends. My life is very blessed.
I mention it (the newer stricter laws) as an alert, it is now coming to the U.S. and if by some change you’ve found yourself as an abuser or enabler of one, please re-evaluate that relationship.
This is a very big day for those of us on the autism spectrum who had no rights (other than basic human/civil ones) but nothing beyond that and often not even that.
I understand the sentence in the UK can be about 14 years but more often than not 5 years. So think about it, parents, especially NPD parents before putting a child/later adult through such a cowardly act.
Now things have changed, and as it turns out, we were “the good guys” after all, just being ourselves. God bless America.
Thanks to my beloved wife Lee Hiller-London who recognized the whole thing. After that, with a bit of research and therapy, all the pieces fell into place. Chances are very slim I might be here otherwise. And it gives me a chance to purvey this important message to others in need. There is plenty of help. Lots and the law is on your side now.
You never have to go through this. Autistics: “Stim, rock, scrape paint”, whatever you have to do for release. It is now allowed (and even encouraged) in public. Public and private school officials are aware of it, as are most advanced workplaces.
When we discovered this, I was sure my beloved wife Lee would run off. I thought to myself “Who could blame her?” Not Lee. She dug in deeper and studied ways to make this work. I will be forever grateful to Lee and to God who sent her into my life.
Rick London is a songwriter, author, designer and cartoonist. He is best known for his Londons Times Offbeat Cartoons and Funny Gifts he found in a tin shed in 1997. He is married to his beloved wife Lee Hiller London who owns Hike Our Planet, a popular nature and wildlife photography blog.