I’ve learned I must have a daughter or son,
Cause just making love causes scarlet letter shame,
Nothing can be deep inside you now,
Bayer’s no longer just for headaches is the claim.
So if by chance you want to be with her,
Her eyes gaze at you like blue skies,
You must learn to disavow,
Bayer Aspirin between your knees cause virgin thighs.
Santorum says you’ll be in hell slowly burning,
But he says there is a holy way.
You must buy her a new wedding ring,
Or a bottle of Bayer for her knees.
Remember sex is a chore only for making babies,
I would love to see Santorum debate Mark Twain
And a woman who has prenatal care…is a just a whore.
Lowest on Santorum’s food chain.
Even if your passion is burning,
Acting on it is foul play,
Only Santorum’s good books are for learning,
Not for hetero-lovers and marrieds that are gay.
Then there’s Mitt’s proxy baptisms with silent spin,
Who won’t even answer calls from the Holocaust Museum.
And while the kids sit in his 4-door,
The Irish Setter’s 8 hours in severe conservative pain.
And while Obama looks it over,
And only his approval rating doesn’t fall,
While the way offtrack GOP focuses on the evils of sex,
Look’s like Barack’s at the 2012 Inaugural Ball.
Rick London is an author, songwriter, designer and cartoonist. He founded Google’s #1 Offbeat Cartoons & Funny Gifts in 1997 (which have been #1 on Google since 2005 and #1 on Bing since 2008). He creates designer gifts at shops like Race4TheCase.com which sells unique IPhone Cases etc and RickLondonWisdomShop.com which offers all types of wisdom quote gifts. He lives with his wife nature photographer Lee Hiller-London in the Ouachita Mountains of Arkansas and they enjoy hiking, nature, wildlife, etc. One of Rick’s most enjoyable elements of writing is song parody; and (though it often seems he takes sides); he claims, “The candidates ALWAYS write my songs for me. I simply dictate what they say, and rearrange a few words”.