Rick London C2011
In America Where Elections Are King
When boy leers at girl,
It’s harassment they say.
When Herman gropes your thigh,
Where he sells pizza pie,
It’s called foul play.
Candlelight and some wine
He went over the line
Had it his way.
Twas just a short fling,
The whole time thought of buffalo wings,.
My Viagra-driven thing.
They were my deep dish, I their fellah,
Sweet as anchovies
I went momentarily astray,
Was there DNA in my drool?
Or was I just a sexual fool,
Either case I had to pay.
Now one’s at Dominoes down the street,
And the other at Pizza Hut but gets no Herman love,
Still love my Godfather’s theme,
Hey there’s a face in this pizza it belongs on Ebay.
So hush money it had to be,
Just so back in Godfather’s got his way.
Your the height of my wife. May I please feel your thigh?
Can I bribe with pizza pie? Whatcha doin’ Friday?
Okay then Saturday.
I only said I went to Moorhead I ain’t lyin’,
Didn’t say I wanted MORE head but that’d be fine.
Did I score, hey?
Dam media stings,
Bunch of liberal left wings,
Wait it’s Fox who just ringed.
Even Bill O’Reilly’s giving me hell-a,
I coulda been a contedah, Stella,
Hush & you’ll get a free buffet.
All you can put on your tray,
Herman’s just a nice fellah,
But an unlucky fellah.
While Restaurant Assn members make you drool thinking making your next move
Having a bad day.
Did that pizza have meat
While Herman’s in heat,
Was it the extra whipped cream,
Why you didn’t stay,
At one time Herman thought he could lead,
Now asking if you’d like bread sticks with that pizza.
Rick London is a mountain man in Arkansas happily married to nature photographer Lee Hiller-London. He is a musician/songwriter, cartoonist, designer & freelance writer. He is active in children, animal, and eco-causes. He enjoys the outdoors/hiking, wildlife, reading animals, books and film. He founded Google’s #1 ranked offbeat cartoons (since 2005) Londons Times Offbeat Cartoons & Funny Gifts. He also designs more serious clothing, gifts and shoes and numerous shops such as his famous wisdom quotes shop Rick London Wisdom Shop.